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I’m From Texas and I’m Not Supposed to Have to Deal With This!

(Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)

Yes, I know the title makes me sound arrogant.  It’s a bit tongue-in-cheek, but, it is true, you know.  This is NOT normal Texas weather, at least not east of the caprock.  It should be 75 degrees by now (at least I think it should).  Two major winter storms in two weeks is too much for this cowboy.  Of course, if we get a quarter inch of ice the whole town goes into lock-down.   We can’t drive on this stuff to save our lives.  Not to mention the fact that by now, I should be deciding where to set the onions out this year.  At long last, we’re thawing.  The ice and snow are just about gone.  But that fear lingers.  The fear that in a week or two the National Weather Service will once again throw down that filthy, vile four letter word.  S N O W.  Between Christmas Eve 2009 and the last two weeks, I’ve come to hate this stuff.  I’ve burned by Bing Crosby Christmas Collection.  Never liked him all that much anyway.  We’re not snow bunnies round here.  This is Texas.  Tornado’s? My neighbors all have cellars and they like me.  Thunderstorms?  Bring ’em on!  Floods?  We’ll build an Ark that even Noah would be envious of!  Snow?  Hell no.  I’m from Texas.  And if that ground hog proves to be a liar, I may just take a trip to Pennsylvania.

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