The headline sounds like it should be a Ray Stevens song, but comedy it's not.

A 430 pound woman entered a Detroit area bank and claimed to have a bomb in her purse.  It turned out that what she really had were two cans of spaghetti sauce.  You'd think that such a large lady would be pretty easy to chase down, or that perhaps the cops would get there before she could make a getaway.  Think again.

According to, Ophelia A. Neal did escape.  The 53 year-old bandit has a history and apparently was easy to i.d.  She's already on parole for fraud, assault and drug charges.  A woman of her considerable...uh...girth...shouldn't be too difficult to track down.The Michigan Department of Corrections say Neal is black, 5-foot-7 and has graying hair.  She escaped in a car driven by an unidentified male.  Authorities have not said just how much money Neal got away with.