Most of America might look forward to Memorial Day because it gives us a three-day break from our hectic work lives and an excuse to grill great gobs of red meat over an open pit, but it’s intentions are much nobler.
Grilling outdoors might seem simple since it’s the way that sub-average intelligent cavemen cooked food for themselves for years, but they’re all dead now — probably because they didn’t know that undercooked meat can cause food poisoning.
In the old days, if you were lucky, you worked until you turned 55, joined the ranks of the retired and scarred your grandkids for life by telling them about all the ears you collected during the big war.
Science has done a lot of great things in our time. It’s brought mankind to the surface of the moon and back. It has given us a bountiful supply of food. It has created super-stretch waistbands on pants for people who are as big as the moon because they consume too much food.
Everyone knows that times are tough, but some are tougher for others.
Take, for instance, your local ice cream man who has become an American staple, especially during the hot summer months in suburban neighborhoods around the country. He’s miserable and he spends his day in a refrigerated van surrounded by tasty frozen treats!
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