If you thought it was okay to get plastered and jump on a riding lawn mower to get from A to B, you might wanna think again. 

I kid you not – an old buddy of mine completely lost his license after getting numerous DUIs, so he used a riding lawn mower to get around. And yes, he was usually three sheets into the wind when he drove it. And no, I didn’t think he was ever in danger of getting a DUI. 

And then I came across the story of 48-year-old Paul Burke. Mr. Burke was cruising down Highway 316 near his home in Fort McCoy, Florida after having a few drinks last Thursday night. 

Of course, he was going way below the speed limit of 55 mph right smack dab in the middle of the highway, so a deputy with the Marion County Sheriff’s Office pulled him over. 

He told the deputy that he was driving the lawn mower because he didn’t have a driver’s license and admitted that he had maybe drank a little too much that night. 

In fact, he was so drunk that he was unable to perform sobriety tests. At one point he told the deputy, “Just take me to jail,” to which the deputy obliged. 

He racked up a pair of felonies due to the fact that he had multiple DUI convictions. He was released from jail the following Monday after posting $11,000 bail. 

My guess is that Mr. Burke is probably going to be going away for a while. 

Check out his mugshot here.

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