Reddit Backs Woman Who Hid Pregnancy From Gossipy Mother-in-Law: ‘I Can’t Trust Her’
One woman has decided to keep her pregnancy a secret because she can't trust her "gossipy" mother-in-law.
Sharing her situation on Reddit, the woman explained that her mother-in-law is "extremely involved" in her and her husband's lives. Even though they are grown adults, the MIL seems to think "she has a say in everything."
"We do love her, but she can be a lot," the woman shared, adding she often receives "lots of unsolicited advice, pushy opinions, etc."
The woman first began noticing her mother-in-law's "extremely gossipy" habits after she was informed about private family topics and then asked to keep tight-lipped about the information.
"We were told of a cousin's pregnancy having birth defects but were told not to tell anyone because she wasn't supposed to tell anyone," she revealed in her Reddit post.
Hoping that she and her husband wouldn't be the topic of future gossip, the woman told her mother-in-law that, when the time came for her and her husband to announce their pregnancy, she hoped they'd be able to make the announcement on their own terms.
However, the mother-in-law made her un-trustworthiness apparent by responding, "It doesn't matter, because no one would tell you they already knew so it would be just as special to you."
Now six weeks into her pregnancy, the woman and her husband have decided to wait until 12 weeks before they share their big news with the MIL.
However, she's wondering if she should tell her own family first, but her husband told her his mother "would never forgive" them if she later found out she was the last to know.
"I agree that she will likely find that out, but I don't think that's our problem, and she should understand why we kept it from her," the woman concluded, asking Reddit for advice.
In the comments section, Reddit users backed the woman's decision.
"Your mother-in-law's refusal to keep a secret has nothing to do with your family's right to know what's going on in your life and your right to have the support of your family during an exciting and also stressful time," one person wrote.
"Tell your family and don't feel guilty. When mother-in-law finds out that everyone knew before her, just tell her honestly that she has made it clear that she can't keep a secret and therefore the consequence is she will not be the first to know things," another commented.
"Go ahead and tell your family. When your MIL finds out later she was the last to know and explodes just calmly tell her, 'It doesn’t matter, because no one told you they already knew so it would be just as special to you,'" someone else chimed in.